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Havent been on for millions of years... Doubt anyone missed me anyway :)

Christmas is coming, im horribly sick and im behind on my exam paper due on january 4th...!
Can't get any better than this... Oh really, well im totally broke, have to work on new years eve and my friend keeps cancelling our appointments!

Got a cat too .. freakin hate it! It annoys the hell outta me! Bleh, wish it would just run away...!
Sis is coming over for christmas at dads place which means im the one cooking!!!! Finally got a letter from jailed brother, since i send him a christmas card... Yay!

Trying to read Dante's the divine comedy, but i've got a fever so i keep falling asleep instead of reading ... Not that its boring, im just weak-willed....

.....

I found him and lost him again!

...

I thought everything was better now, but it can all collapse anytime ...


Help me out of this black hole im in ...











Do I love you ? Is there any point in loving you ?

.:.:.:.:.

Agrafina

Im kinda trying to write a book atm .. Inspired by the twilight saga of course, but nothing like tho... The pic is just something i did for fun ... it only took 5 min. tho so it didnt keep me busy for long ..

Well im in jylland .. im freakin bored, i miss my room and my stuff, i miss my cd's .. i miss being able to lock myself in my room, listen to music and forget the world . this is so not healthy for me ... my mum finally snapped, she's been admitted in a mental hospital, and my sis' just crazy, she doesnt get shit! i can't really go back home cos then my sis will be alone with my mums boyfriend and she cant stand him, so that would be kinda cruel ...

but yeah thats the story of my life ..

when will it all end

Yeah so here I am once again .. still miserable, probs more miserable than before? yeah more ..
Well i packed some of my stuff and went to my moms, to relax, get a job and spend more time with my sis ... 1 week and then my moms was admitted to a psychiatric hospital .. WTF! That's just my luck .. my family is insane and so am I ... there is nowhere on this planet where I can just be myself and relax ... they're all mental .. plus my fosterparents are probably getting a divorce and I have no idea where my brother is .. probs in jail ... ! Morten has abandoned me, so all i have left is Julie and she's in the other end of the god damn country .. luckily DK aint that big but i aint got any money to go visit her ... i feel homeless, helpless and utterly miserable ... what's the point in going on?
To quote Stephenie Meyer; Life sucks, then you die .... I should be so lucky!

"But I'm only an image of a strange child and one night when they're sleeping safely, I leave my frame." Tove Ditlevsen

major change

... Fools rush in ...

I've been doing NADA for almost 6 months! It has to end, but my mental state is still shit.. So I've decided to leave my life as I know it, and am going to my moms place in Jylland (guess they call it Jutland in english?) I'll be working with my mums boyfriend and I will probably go to Uni there aswell .. Havent told my dad yet, cos he's 100 % set on me going to uni in copenhagen and Århus (where I'll be going to uni) is quite far away .. i hate breaking his heart... but ive come to the conclusion that the best way to get back on my feet is to start all over somewhere else... I'll miss my friends, but they are only a train ride away so it's not like i'll never see them again and of course i'm not moving away just yet .. Still need to find a place to live if im going to Århus University .. But the hardest part is telling my dad and my fostermum, my fosterdad knows cos he overheard a conversation i had with my mum on the phone ... well i was sitting in the car so i knew he would hear .. anyways i need to grow up .. preferably soon!

rant

GODDAMMIT I CAN'T STAND HIM!

I watched a documentary yesterday about Bush and his wars,,, How can someone go to war claiming to be democracy, justice and liberty and then tortur innocent people!!!! MAY YOU BURN IN HELL!!!!!!!!!!!! argh, bla bla bla... he pisses me off .. okay yeah 9.11 was horrible and the entire world mourned on USAs behalf, but is it really worse than what they are doing in the middle east? killling innocent people, spreading horror etc.